Anthrax Island

A prominent coach tour operator’s brochure for 2017 lists “Anthrax Island” as a highlight of their itinerary between Inverewe Gardens and Ullapool. There’s a thought. They do also promise a most memorable holiday.

Gruinard Island was the site of a biological warfare test in 1942 which rendered it a danger zone for decades until a more recent decontamination programme was deemed successful. The flock of sheep allowed back there since have shown no ill effects, apparently.

My more immediate concerns are chemical rather than biological. The gym changing rooms have a notice requesting more restricted use of aerosol sprays. This does nothing to deter the young blades, who must go through a couple of canisters a week. I just take a deep breath when the offending articles emerge from their bags and make a run for it ASAP.

On the home front, I have a feeling that cat flea spray is potentially more harmful than cat fleas are and that having weeds in the garden is healthier for you than spraying weed killer. There is asbestos in the prefabricated sheets that make up the ceiling in the garage, which is another good reason not to go in there looking for tools, or, in fact, anything to do with unnecessary home improvements that could be bad for one’s health.

Yet, who could forget the sulphurous contents of a full steam shed on a Sunday morning. We breathed in that stuff happily enough and then complained about the fumes from the diesels that deposed them.

It’s an environmental minefield out there. The shame is that you would look such a prat wearing a face mask, especially on a coach tour of the highlands and islands. I still think I’d stay on the bus for that bit, though. “Move on, driver, please.”

A very smoky Birkenhead sheds in the early 1960s. Photo with thanks to Ian Hughes.